I like a lot of things in my Bloody Mary. Cotton Candy Vodka isn't one of them. (Credit: Toni Osmundson / Unsplash.com)
Have you ever heard of Anna Jarvis? Yeah, I hadn’t either. But as it turns out, it is thanks to her that you may be treated to breakfast-in-bed this weekend.
Mother’s Day actually got its start thanks to this single Philadelphian, Anna Jarvis, who missed her mother. In 1905, Jarvis lost her mom, so she decided to take her grieving and turn it into something positive. In 1907, she held the first “Mother’s Day memorial service,” and the rest, as they say, was history.
By 1914, campaigning largely led by Jarvis, made the day a national holiday. Jarvis’ first memorial, May 12, 1907, later turned into Woodrow Wilson making the date one to remember. In fact, Jarvis also promoted wearing a white carnation as a tribute to your mother, too. Later, the custom branched out into wearing a pink or red one for a living mother or honoring a deceased mom with white.
But, today’s Mother’s Day, well it goes well beyond donning a corsage for a day. Like most American holidays, it’s of course become over-commercialized. What would a celebration be in the U.S. without tons of television, radio, online, and print ads promoting all you should spend to show mom you care.
As a mom who has said it myself, and for all that have heard it year in and year out, I’m sure you know the usual request.
“Oh, I don’t need anything. I just would like to enjoy the day with you.”
Strange, we all get the same things each year. I’m kidding, mostly. But we all know moms are tough to shop for no matter the time of the year.
I have fond memories of my babies making me breakfast-in-bed, their favorite self-made creations in hand. Homemade cards, dry toast, and a can of Diet Pepsi one year. Another time, knowing my love for the holiday beverage, they even looked up and made me a Bloody Mary for my breakfast-in-bed. Sadly, they used cotton candy-flavored vodka, so it had an … interesting … flavor.
Nevertheless, these are the memories I will always hold dear. I remember some with my mom, before she passed in 2020. I remember seeking out a gift and sharing it with my sister just two years younger. She would always tell. She could never make it to the big day before destroying our surprise. Some may say she is a devoted truth-teller. As the older sister, I wanted to murder her. It’s all about perspective.
But no, it is not the over-commercialization of all of our celebrations that has me on my soapbox today. Instead, I would like to take a moment to remind you that Mother’s Day isn’t just for your mom. Of course, please do call your mom. Please take her to brunch or drinks or dinner. Please spend time, even if on the phone, and enjoy her on Sunday. Believe me, once she is gone and you don’t have that chance, you will miss it.
Thankfully, I have another mother. In my case, it was my stepmom who made major impacts on my life. She was there for me when my biological mom could not be, helping me through some of my life’s toughest stages. I owe her a lot, and “step” is not a word we ever use. She’s my mom, too. And I always celebrate her on this special day.
I think many people have important folks in their lives that aren’t biologically related. They may not be any tie to the family at all. It could be a neighbor or a friend. We have role models in our lives that come from all walks of life, and not just those we are tied to by genetics.
Mother’s Day is a great time to recognize those folks, too. In my world, we don’t use “step” or “half” or any other word than lessens our connections. (And to be perfectly honest, even those of us in this family can’t always remember how or why we got “related” to some of these folks.) But, nonetheless, they are an important part of our lives.
Moms come in all shapes and sizes. Moms can be anybody that impacted your life. They can be someone that mentored you, someone that listened, someone that stood by you when times were tough. I’m lucky enough to have had two moms in this life and four grandmothers. I’m even luckier to say I still have three of those women in my life. At my age, batting 500 is a pretty solid statistic! I am blessed.
As we all prepare for Sunday, we will have different ways of celebrating our mothers. It is important to remember, it is not just the person that brought you into this world, but those that helped to make it what it is that matter most on Mother’s Day. Be grateful for all they’ve done in your life and take some time to honor them this Sunday.
And moms, whatever may come your way Sunday, know you’ll look back on it fondly and cherish these days for years to come. It may only be a handmade card or a burnt pancake but know that it was all made with love. I hope you get a chance to relax, enjoy your day, and take in your children, however they may reach out.
And if you must choke down a cotton candy vodka Bloody Mary, I’ll pray for you. I promise, you’ll laugh about it later.
